The gate agent’s voice crackled through the airport speakers at 3:17 a.m. “Final boarding call for flight 442 to Maui.” I clutched my boarding pass with trembling fingers, the paper already damp with sweat and tears.
Behind me, somewhere in our suburban house forty minutes away, thirty place settings sat empty on the dining room table I had spent three hours arranging the night before. The turkey I was supposed to have started preparing an hour ago remained frozen solid in the refrigerator, like my heart had been for the past five years.
My phone buzzed with another text from Hudson. “Hope you’re up cooking, babe. Mom’s already texting about timing.”
I switched it off and stepped onto the plane, leaving behind more than just a Thanksgiving dinner. I was abandoning a life that had slowly strangled me one helpful suggestion and dismissive comment at a time.
As the plane lifted into the dark sky, I pressed my forehead against the cold window and watched the city lights fade below. Somewhere down there, Vivien would arrive at 2 p.m. expecting her perfect feast. And Hudson would stand there, confused, probably calling me selfish for the first time to my face instead of behind my back to his mother.
But I wouldn’t be there to see the shock in their eyes. I wouldn’t be there to apologize. For once in five years, I wouldn’t be there at all. And that thought terrified and thrilled me in equal measure.
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Three days earlier, the sound of Vivien’s heels clicking across our hardwood floor always reminded me of a judge’s gavel: sharp, decisive, final. She swept into our kitchen like she owned it, which according to Hudson, she practically did, since they’d helped us with the down payment.
